officially on SPRING BREAK (wooooo hooo) for eastern...too bad it doesn't line up with spring garden...
in other news i have officially lost my mind and if i forget one more thing I'm going to claim insanity.
also i am going to be able to graduate in TWO YEARS again!!! praise jesus
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
The Broad Street RUN
well..the new car is serving it's purpose, although it doesn't seem like "my car" quite yet. I suppose that will come in time.
Tonight Katie and I started our training for our half marathon, the broad st run, on May 3.
Yes, thas right. You read this post correctly. Carolyn Larrivee and Katie Fet will be running a half marathon in 11 weeks. And yes, we have lost our minds. Katie signed up for the gym tonight and we did 3 miles and our regular training with Gary who KICKED our butts..I don't think I've ever run 3 miles in my entire life. ever.
We welcome any other crazies who want to run with us too :)
But i found out it's all mental and switchfoot is a great band to listen to while running..any other music suggestions for this long haul for us?? suggestions very welcome!!
Tonight Katie and I started our training for our half marathon, the broad st run, on May 3.
Yes, thas right. You read this post correctly. Carolyn Larrivee and Katie Fet will be running a half marathon in 11 weeks. And yes, we have lost our minds. Katie signed up for the gym tonight and we did 3 miles and our regular training with Gary who KICKED our butts..I don't think I've ever run 3 miles in my entire life. ever.
We welcome any other crazies who want to run with us too :)
But i found out it's all mental and switchfoot is a great band to listen to while running..any other music suggestions for this long haul for us?? suggestions very welcome!!
Friday, February 20, 2009
name the whip
welp...the week is over. And the highlights are:
a new phone
a new car
a new computer virus
a new kindergarten schedule
and no sleep.
I think overwhelmed doesn't begin to cover it...but heres the new car...any name suggestions??
a new phone
a new car
a new computer virus
a new kindergarten schedule
and no sleep.
I think overwhelmed doesn't begin to cover it...but heres the new car...any name suggestions??
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
RIP Thumper
I have owned Thumper since November 2007, so she has had a good run but yesterday she went out to the middle of no where, like a dog, to die as KAtie Fet so pointedly put it. She is currently in a Pathmark parking lot with the keys locked inside because only I could manage to lock my keys in my dead car...at least I can say with confidence that is the first time I have ever done that, and I always worried I would with this car...
As my new favorite singer/songwriter says...
you want to cry but you can't keep from laughing. deb.talan.
As my new favorite singer/songwriter says...
you want to cry but you can't keep from laughing. deb.talan.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
"You would be going 40 in a 25"
I got pulled over this weekend.
Let me rewind. I had an amazing weekend with awesome friends at Delaware first and then went to Dover, got to switch cars with my mom and then headed to the beach. My retreat. I had lunch with Schroder and then went to herring point...my favorite place to reflect on the east coast, especially in winter when no one is there.
Anyway, I spent an hour praying, reflecting, thinking..so when in my moms new feels like you're floating on air when youre driving car, I was speeding. 40 in a 25 people. So I get pulled over bby a park ranger. I pull over and look in my rear view mirror to see none other than park ranger manning...andy manning, a good friend of mine from when i worked in the park. I started laughing hysterically before he could tell who it was and then when he realized it was me the first thing out of his mouth was "you would be going 40 in a 25"...Needless to say we talked for an hour and he let me go on my merry way. It was the best time I have ever had getting pulled over in my life.
Here is a picture I took while I was sitting on the beach this weekend...i kind of want to make it an every week kind of thing...
Let me rewind. I had an amazing weekend with awesome friends at Delaware first and then went to Dover, got to switch cars with my mom and then headed to the beach. My retreat. I had lunch with Schroder and then went to herring point...my favorite place to reflect on the east coast, especially in winter when no one is there.
Anyway, I spent an hour praying, reflecting, thinking..so when in my moms new feels like you're floating on air when youre driving car, I was speeding. 40 in a 25 people. So I get pulled over bby a park ranger. I pull over and look in my rear view mirror to see none other than park ranger manning...andy manning, a good friend of mine from when i worked in the park. I started laughing hysterically before he could tell who it was and then when he realized it was me the first thing out of his mouth was "you would be going 40 in a 25"...Needless to say we talked for an hour and he let me go on my merry way. It was the best time I have ever had getting pulled over in my life.
Here is a picture I took while I was sitting on the beach this weekend...i kind of want to make it an every week kind of thing...
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
there is a God
Every Tuesday Gary, the personal trainer at the YMCA, kicks my butt. And every week I bring more girls. Today was no different, however, I believe Gary "I have a ridiculous beard" trainer was overwhelmed by the excitement of one particular girl who will not be named, but shes blonde and lives with me...I'm gonna bring her every week. it was awesome!!
In a side note...there is something in the Philly water that is making all the kids in schools go crazy..this has been confirmed by more than one teacher and more than one school.
Also my ipod was stolen on Friday and I realized how much I need music and how dependent I am on it. Annie challenged me in this to show me how dependent on some material I am.I was talking to my roomies about this when I got a text from my assistant at school telling me she accidentally took it on Friday in her sweater...she had me sweating all day...I was so sad and nervous I had a klepto in my class. and to this i reply...there is a God.
In a side note...there is something in the Philly water that is making all the kids in schools go crazy..this has been confirmed by more than one teacher and more than one school.
Also my ipod was stolen on Friday and I realized how much I need music and how dependent I am on it. Annie challenged me in this to show me how dependent on some material I am.I was talking to my roomies about this when I got a text from my assistant at school telling me she accidentally took it on Friday in her sweater...she had me sweating all day...I was so sad and nervous I had a klepto in my class. and to this i reply...there is a God.
Monday, February 9, 2009
weekend highlights
Some highlights from my amazing weekend...
-Mike Cavaliere moves slow.
-my pastor and nick ferguson have the same weird hand motions when they talk, but im pretty sure nick is joking when he does it...maybe
-i found why "hes just not that into me" and so did 100 other women and about 7 guys
-there was a woman walking a horse in rhittenhouse square yesterday while we went for a walk in the beautiful 60 degree weather...and i got to wear flip flops and eat ice cream..AWESOME
-I saw a guy get robbed...but he was there so he chop sueyed the other guys arm and got his stuff back
-i became a counselor and i got counseled...
-i learned things in fake counseling that were not so fake
-figured out the people of philadelphia really go to the pro soccer games to watch the dancers...some of which are preggo...
-colorado came to me
-drank too much coffee
-had weird dreams
-found out you have to be a latino man to get a seat in dave & busters...my wait was an hour, but jorge got us in in 5 minutes..
-i have video chat capabilities for gmail on my computer! And so does Andrea..and we like to talk to each other while sitting directly across from each other at our kitchen table and laugh hysterically about it, hoping no one else walks in...
-i have a strong dislike for katy perry
-but a strong love for coldplay
-Mike Cavaliere moves slow.
-my pastor and nick ferguson have the same weird hand motions when they talk, but im pretty sure nick is joking when he does it...maybe
-i found why "hes just not that into me" and so did 100 other women and about 7 guys
-there was a woman walking a horse in rhittenhouse square yesterday while we went for a walk in the beautiful 60 degree weather...and i got to wear flip flops and eat ice cream..AWESOME
-I saw a guy get robbed...but he was there so he chop sueyed the other guys arm and got his stuff back
-i became a counselor and i got counseled...
-i learned things in fake counseling that were not so fake
-figured out the people of philadelphia really go to the pro soccer games to watch the dancers...some of which are preggo...
-colorado came to me
-drank too much coffee
-had weird dreams
-found out you have to be a latino man to get a seat in dave & busters...my wait was an hour, but jorge got us in in 5 minutes..
-i have video chat capabilities for gmail on my computer! And so does Andrea..and we like to talk to each other while sitting directly across from each other at our kitchen table and laugh hysterically about it, hoping no one else walks in...
-i have a strong dislike for katy perry
-but a strong love for coldplay
Thursday, February 5, 2009
pressure me that i may grow more human...
Tonight Tom Gorman, full name please, came and took me and a couple friends out to dinner at this place downtown called the Belgian Cafe...they had about 6 pages of beer..it was overwhelming and beautiful.
but TODAY we went to the aquarium for a field trip at the Jersey aquarium and I must say this may be the first good thing I have seen Jersey ever offer...because they had HIPPOS!!!!! And I realized that I had never in my life sen a real live hippo before..only Sammy, who I sleep with everynight. (as pictured before) And they are HUGE! (thats what she said) and one kept following me everywhere I went...it was kind of creepy when Miss. Caretta pointed it out.
Speaking of Ms. Caretta...she told me she was going to make a bubble and post it above my head that read Ms. Carolyn: "I forgot!" "I feel like the worst person ever" because apparently thats all I say...
For now I leave you with my favorite reminder ever...a poem from ted loder that emily boston sent me so long ago but i still read it all the time....
O persistent God, deliver me from assuming your mercy is gentle.
Pressure me that I may grow more human,
not through the lessening of my struggles,
but through an expansion of them
that will undamn me and unbury my gifts.
Deepen my hurt
until I learn to share it
and myself openly,
and my needs honestly.
Sharpen my fears
until I name them
and release the power I have locked in them and they in me.
Accentuate my confusion
until I shed those grandiose expectations
that divert me from the small, glad gifts
of the now and the here and the me.
Expose my shame where it shivers,
crouched behind the curtains of propriety,
until I can laugh at last through my common frailties and failures,
laugh my way toward becoming whole.
Deliver me from just going through the motions
and wasting everything I have
which is today,
a chance,a choice, my creativity, your call.
O persistent God,
let how much it all matters pry me off dead center so if I am moved inside
to tears or sighs or screams or smiles or dreams,
they will be real and I will be in touch with who I am and who you are
and who my sisters and brothers are.
but TODAY we went to the aquarium for a field trip at the Jersey aquarium and I must say this may be the first good thing I have seen Jersey ever offer...because they had HIPPOS!!!!! And I realized that I had never in my life sen a real live hippo before..only Sammy, who I sleep with everynight. (as pictured before) And they are HUGE! (thats what she said) and one kept following me everywhere I went...it was kind of creepy when Miss. Caretta pointed it out.
Speaking of Ms. Caretta...she told me she was going to make a bubble and post it above my head that read Ms. Carolyn: "I forgot!" "I feel like the worst person ever" because apparently thats all I say...
For now I leave you with my favorite reminder ever...a poem from ted loder that emily boston sent me so long ago but i still read it all the time....
O persistent God, deliver me from assuming your mercy is gentle.
Pressure me that I may grow more human,
not through the lessening of my struggles,
but through an expansion of them
that will undamn me and unbury my gifts.
Deepen my hurt
until I learn to share it
and myself openly,
and my needs honestly.
Sharpen my fears
until I name them
and release the power I have locked in them and they in me.
Accentuate my confusion
until I shed those grandiose expectations
that divert me from the small, glad gifts
of the now and the here and the me.
Expose my shame where it shivers,
crouched behind the curtains of propriety,
until I can laugh at last through my common frailties and failures,
laugh my way toward becoming whole.
Deliver me from just going through the motions
and wasting everything I have
which is today,
a chance,a choice, my creativity, your call.
O persistent God,
let how much it all matters pry me off dead center so if I am moved inside
to tears or sighs or screams or smiles or dreams,
they will be real and I will be in touch with who I am and who you are
and who my sisters and brothers are.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
less than a month until the launch meeting for the south philly church plant.
i am so pumped...but we talked a lot about fasting tonight at the meeting in preparation for it, which i would love to get some feedback/stories/humor/insight/enlightenment or any other sort of tidbit you may have on the subject
...and 2 more days until the weekend, also which i am so excited about....lots of visitors, lots to do, not much homework. could life get better?? i submit that it cannot!
i am so pumped...but we talked a lot about fasting tonight at the meeting in preparation for it, which i would love to get some feedback/stories/humor/insight/enlightenment or any other sort of tidbit you may have on the subject
...and 2 more days until the weekend, also which i am so excited about....lots of visitors, lots to do, not much homework. could life get better?? i submit that it cannot!
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
SNOW!
there is so much snow in philly. and i am in love with it. it actually makes me like the city. so i get a text message (mass text to the south philly biddies) about scott wanting donuts....and i interpret this message as dunkin donuts and i am ALL about it. As the girls and I are headed out to Scott's car, I ask why no one else is bringing their wallets...and they proceeded to inform me he did not want to EAT donuts he wanted to MAKE them...in his jeep...in the snow. So we went to a parking lot, made donuts, watched a snow plow make some SWEET donuts to show off, drive up the steps of the art museum, jump around a lot, and then ended the night with some amazing dunkin donuts, just for me :)
here are some of the pictures capturing the best night I have had in philly to date.
here are some of the pictures capturing the best night I have had in philly to date.
Monday, February 2, 2009
wanna spice up your monday?
today andrea, dano and i helped out in front of the library feeding a bunch of people who came out to get a nice warm meal. it was so so so great and it reminded me so much of my time in denver with the people, the thank yous and the conversations. i think you should all join me as i start to make it a weekly tradition here in philly. every monday between 3:30-5ish.
on a side note: I LOVE SNOW. I want to be covered in it all the time. But i live in philly, so i get ice and slush.
i mean look at all the cool things people in colorado do with their snow...these are legit snow sculptures. crazy
on a side note: I LOVE SNOW. I want to be covered in it all the time. But i live in philly, so i get ice and slush.
i mean look at all the cool things people in colorado do with their snow...these are legit snow sculptures. crazy
Sunday, February 1, 2009
the list.
Withdraw from facebook is a hard thing, but it has been good. I have been really productive for the past week. I have starting writing snail mail letters and getting things crossed off my "to-do" list that have been on there for months!!
don't worry people, me and the pictures will be back up may 1 2009. Its not that far away when you realize that its already FEBRUARY!!! We'll have a party.
Haley inspired me to make a list of 7 things you may not know about me. Facebook has taken on to this idea as well (or so i hear) but they have the lame 25 and this idea is definitely pre facebook jump on the band wagon.
1. Before I get on an airplane, I have to touch the side of it (like when I step in) or else I feel like it will crash...maybe its to check its real and stable or something, I have many other weird quirks or routines like this
2. My dream growing up was to be a stunt pilot. I love flying. Being up high and jumping out of planes
3. When I was younger I lied to the eye doctor about "better one or better two" so I could get glasses (3rd grade) and when I lost them I told my mom my sight was magically better and that I didn't need them anymore..I think God's punishment to me for that is my awful vision now.
4. When I was in 4th grade I had labels on the chest at the end of my bed that said "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday" and I would lay out all my clothes for the week on Sunday night.
5. When my friends are talking about something intelligent and everyone knows whats going on I nod my head and respond with things like "yea" or "uh huh" like I know what they are talking about or what that word means when really I have no idea and I'm too scared to ask people in fear of being labeled dumb
6. I'm dyslexic.
7. I have a crazy sense of smell, and it can really affect my mood.
don't worry people, me and the pictures will be back up may 1 2009. Its not that far away when you realize that its already FEBRUARY!!! We'll have a party.
Haley inspired me to make a list of 7 things you may not know about me. Facebook has taken on to this idea as well (or so i hear) but they have the lame 25 and this idea is definitely pre facebook jump on the band wagon.
1. Before I get on an airplane, I have to touch the side of it (like when I step in) or else I feel like it will crash...maybe its to check its real and stable or something, I have many other weird quirks or routines like this
2. My dream growing up was to be a stunt pilot. I love flying. Being up high and jumping out of planes
3. When I was younger I lied to the eye doctor about "better one or better two" so I could get glasses (3rd grade) and when I lost them I told my mom my sight was magically better and that I didn't need them anymore..I think God's punishment to me for that is my awful vision now.
4. When I was in 4th grade I had labels on the chest at the end of my bed that said "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday" and I would lay out all my clothes for the week on Sunday night.
5. When my friends are talking about something intelligent and everyone knows whats going on I nod my head and respond with things like "yea" or "uh huh" like I know what they are talking about or what that word means when really I have no idea and I'm too scared to ask people in fear of being labeled dumb
6. I'm dyslexic.
7. I have a crazy sense of smell, and it can really affect my mood.
Monday, January 26, 2009
goodbye facebook...
Well last night I did it, with the moral support of 2/3 of my roommates I made the decision to leave facebook until April 29 when my semester is over. It hasn't even been 24 hours off of facebook and I already have accomplished more in the past morning than I have in the past 3 months. Facebook = carolyns sad, sad addiction.
Until the end of the semester you can get me at carolynlarrivee@gmail.com..yes, I will still have gchat and I will be using this blog probably more frequently. And you know that crazy device called a phone..yea I still have that too. :)
"I believe the greatest trick of the devil is not to get us into some sort of evil, but rather have us wasting time.
{This is why the devil tries so hard to get Christians to be religious.} "
DONALD MILLER. blue.like.jazz.
Until the end of the semester you can get me at carolynlarrivee@gmail.com..yes, I will still have gchat and I will be using this blog probably more frequently. And you know that crazy device called a phone..yea I still have that too. :)
"I believe the greatest trick of the devil is not to get us into some sort of evil, but rather have us wasting time.
{This is why the devil tries so hard to get Christians to be religious.} "
DONALD MILLER. blue.like.jazz.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Every day is ice cream and chocolate cake
I have had so much time to reflect while I've been here in colorado and as much as I love it and I feel like every other minute I am thinking about the reasons why i need to be here forever...Part of the reason for that is because its easier to believe in God here...i know you are confused, I am too but when I see the kind of beauty that I saw at sunset tonight you would understand why too...
but more than anything I have been thinking about contentment. The moment, your life, the current situation..it all is what it is. you cant change it...And I am in philadelphia now, although I hate the city I love the people. I have amazing roommates, friends, and a church that I wouldnt change for the world. And for that. I am truly thankful and content. It is what it is. And to me it is wonderful.
These are some lyrics I have been listening to on repeat from the weepies...
You can ask about it, but nobody knows the way
No breadcrumb trail to follow through your days
It takes an axe, sometimes a feather
In the sunshine and bad weather
It's a matter of getting deeper in, any way you can
All this beauty
You might have to close your eyes
And slowly open wide
All this beauty, we traveled all night
We drank the ocean dry
And watched the sun rise
I can see your new awake
Let me assure you friend:
Every day is ice cream and chocolate cake
And what you make of it, let me say
You get what you take from it so be amazed
And never stop, never stop, never stop
You gotta be brave
but more than anything I have been thinking about contentment. The moment, your life, the current situation..it all is what it is. you cant change it...And I am in philadelphia now, although I hate the city I love the people. I have amazing roommates, friends, and a church that I wouldnt change for the world. And for that. I am truly thankful and content. It is what it is. And to me it is wonderful.
These are some lyrics I have been listening to on repeat from the weepies...
You can ask about it, but nobody knows the way
No breadcrumb trail to follow through your days
It takes an axe, sometimes a feather
In the sunshine and bad weather
It's a matter of getting deeper in, any way you can
All this beauty
You might have to close your eyes
And slowly open wide
All this beauty, we traveled all night
We drank the ocean dry
And watched the sun rise
I can see your new awake
Let me assure you friend:
Every day is ice cream and chocolate cake
And what you make of it, let me say
You get what you take from it so be amazed
And never stop, never stop, never stop
You gotta be brave
Friday, January 9, 2009
reasons why...
Saw the movie yes man tonight and i was actually really impressed...i laughed really hard during some parts and it wasnt what i expected at all. it makes me want to say yes to everything..
in other news i have started rediscovering old music because i have been spending so much time in the car driving to and from the mountains and i have also had much time to think about reasons why i should move back here..
-mountains
-beauty
-snow
-nice people
-snow
-weather
-activity level
-snow
more to come on that later...
for now i leave you with this little gem
Thursday, January 1, 2009
6 degrees of kevin bacon?
Well I always knew I would run into people who know other people, but its becoming somewhat ridiculous. I feel as though every time i meet someone new i play the oh do you know so and so? and they dont but they know someone COMPLETELY random that they shouldnt know.
for example:
I went to olive garden with my family in newark the other night and i was talking to our waiter who is from lewes...so i asked him if he knew some people i knew in lewes, he did not know them but SOMEHOW we realized he is cousins with a girl i used to dance with for years and was really good friends with in dover...random.
also, last night at our new years party I watched friends from delaware interact with people I knew from philly because they already knew each other....it blows my mind...which is another reason why whenever someone new friends me on facebook i immediately check our "mutual friends"
So for now i leave you with this picture
and my new years resolution...to work out more. i thought i'd be original this year :)
for example:
I went to olive garden with my family in newark the other night and i was talking to our waiter who is from lewes...so i asked him if he knew some people i knew in lewes, he did not know them but SOMEHOW we realized he is cousins with a girl i used to dance with for years and was really good friends with in dover...random.
also, last night at our new years party I watched friends from delaware interact with people I knew from philly because they already knew each other....it blows my mind...which is another reason why whenever someone new friends me on facebook i immediately check our "mutual friends"
So for now i leave you with this picture
and my new years resolution...to work out more. i thought i'd be original this year :)
Saturday, December 27, 2008
high school?
Last night I went out and got new snowboarding gear which you would think would be the highlight of my evening...until i got back to dover and i went to the one of three bars we have here and saw about half the people I went to high school with which i have not seen since high school. I'm not really sure why Ive been avoiding it, since it was bound to happen in dover anyways - it wasnt really all that painful, in fact it was really quite pleasant.
and for some reason these are the only high school pictures i can find on this computer....
and for some reason these are the only high school pictures i can find on this computer....
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Have yourself a merry little christmas
Well. I have a new computer. I got a Sony something or other and I must say I have not been so impressed with it. it is already letting me down and thats depressing since I have had it for only about 24 hours now.
In other news..we had the shortest christmas eve service in history - under an hour! It just didnt feel right. But we did manage to come in late, take up the entire pew since we had 10 people with us and make enough noise to annoy all of the other 15 people at my dads church...awesome.
So for now i leave you with this little diddy...in honor of Ron Jester, who unfortunately was not at my dads service this year or last..he is missed...but this is a pretty good representation of what we have to listen to every year.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
4 weeks down, 2 weeks to go
Well, two weeks from today I will be packing my bags and heading back to the states. It’s crazy to think that 4 weeks have already gone by. I feel like I just left the states, but I also feel like I have been in India forever. It is nothing like I expected and I am living much more comfortably than I thought.
I started working at a new organization a week ago, I split my time between two orphanages. Three weeks at one, and three weeks at the one I am at now. The two organizations, living situations, and jobs I am doing could not be more different. The first organization I was working at I stayed with the children at the hostel, but now I am living with a family, and living quite comfortably. I have a hot shower (most days) and 3 meals a day as well as my own bedroom and bathroom with running water and electricity. It’s funny how developed Bangalore is - nothing like I thought. I wear long skirts and semi frumpy clothes with no make-up (making for some great pictures!) while everyone else who lives here is wearing jeans, make up, and always looking trendy and nice. It’s actually quite funny. The family I’m staying with took me out to get a pair of jeans so I would fit in more. I didn’t bring any because I thought it was going to be deathly hot. It’s not hot here at all - I was actually cold last night! Crazy!! I can wear jeans and long pants and be very comfortable and not sweat. I was appreciative of the clothes I brought when I was living in the orphanage because I would go outside and play cricket with the kids, or run around, sit on the ground and never care about my clothes or getting dirty. But now that I am in a new organization and I am sitting with adults most of the time, I always feel a bit underdressed.
I am learning so much about myself and about others and culture since I have been here. The culture is very different, but the guys I am working with are very open about talking it through with me. They explain the way households are run, how women are treated and how children are disciplined. All very, very different from the way I was raised and from what I understand to be “right”. But I am in India now, so now I am wrong in my thinking. I am being open to learning and integrating into the culture. There have only been a few minor bumps along the way. But I am so thankful for the guys openness and honesty with me to teach me and not get offended because I don’t know any better. And in the same way - they want to know about American culture and the way I was raised too. It’s really cool.
I have been learning about prayer and worship since I have been here as well. Because the culture is predominantly hindu, staying with Christians has been really awesome to see the kind f struggles they have and the kind if faith that they have that even though they face persecution, death threats, trials…they are not pushed down. I am reminded constantly of 2 Corinthians 4:8-12;16-18:
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair, persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is in work in you.
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us and eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not o what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Beautiful! And people are always singing here, all the time. They are always talking about God and praying before they do everything - eat, make decisions, drive. Everything. It has been a good reminder for me when I get back to the states that God is first in everything I do.
That’s all for now, I should get to doing some work and drinking some tea. i drink a lot of tea here….
I started working at a new organization a week ago, I split my time between two orphanages. Three weeks at one, and three weeks at the one I am at now. The two organizations, living situations, and jobs I am doing could not be more different. The first organization I was working at I stayed with the children at the hostel, but now I am living with a family, and living quite comfortably. I have a hot shower (most days) and 3 meals a day as well as my own bedroom and bathroom with running water and electricity. It’s funny how developed Bangalore is - nothing like I thought. I wear long skirts and semi frumpy clothes with no make-up (making for some great pictures!) while everyone else who lives here is wearing jeans, make up, and always looking trendy and nice. It’s actually quite funny. The family I’m staying with took me out to get a pair of jeans so I would fit in more. I didn’t bring any because I thought it was going to be deathly hot. It’s not hot here at all - I was actually cold last night! Crazy!! I can wear jeans and long pants and be very comfortable and not sweat. I was appreciative of the clothes I brought when I was living in the orphanage because I would go outside and play cricket with the kids, or run around, sit on the ground and never care about my clothes or getting dirty. But now that I am in a new organization and I am sitting with adults most of the time, I always feel a bit underdressed.
I am learning so much about myself and about others and culture since I have been here. The culture is very different, but the guys I am working with are very open about talking it through with me. They explain the way households are run, how women are treated and how children are disciplined. All very, very different from the way I was raised and from what I understand to be “right”. But I am in India now, so now I am wrong in my thinking. I am being open to learning and integrating into the culture. There have only been a few minor bumps along the way. But I am so thankful for the guys openness and honesty with me to teach me and not get offended because I don’t know any better. And in the same way - they want to know about American culture and the way I was raised too. It’s really cool.
I have been learning about prayer and worship since I have been here as well. Because the culture is predominantly hindu, staying with Christians has been really awesome to see the kind f struggles they have and the kind if faith that they have that even though they face persecution, death threats, trials…they are not pushed down. I am reminded constantly of 2 Corinthians 4:8-12;16-18:
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair, persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is in work in you.
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us and eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not o what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Beautiful! And people are always singing here, all the time. They are always talking about God and praying before they do everything - eat, make decisions, drive. Everything. It has been a good reminder for me when I get back to the states that God is first in everything I do.
That’s all for now, I should get to doing some work and drinking some tea. i drink a lot of tea here….
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
tomorrow i leave the hostel where I have been staying. I'm going to stay with some friends I met here and work for their organization I'll be doing development of their programs, admin stuff, teaching bible study every night adn helping with tutoring. I am so excited about the change in work but I am so beyond depressed about leaving the kids in the place I am at now. I really love them and want to adopt them all. I have become way more attached than I ever thought I would.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
food, demons, and toys.
I come back to the states in about 1 month, and when I do you will not recognize me for 3 reasons:
One:
In a culture where no means yes and leaving food on your plate, no matter how much you started out with, is rude...I am stuffed and gaining weight. All the time. I am considering telling people I am fasting everyday and then sneaking food when I am alone. They believe in force feeding over here and guests get extra and no matter how long I stay, I am still considered a guest. So i try to stuff all the food in and then they give me more..
Two:
I will be covered in paint, or mendhi..the girls at the hostel love to put this traditional paint on me, on my hands and arms. They said it only lasts 10 days, but when I went to school the next day all the teachers said..oh no, it lasts 2 months. I hope its off in time for Jessica's wedding!!
Three:
I will be speaking about 95% less than before I left. I figure since I sit in silence so much here, I will get used to not speaking and become a "quiet person" OR (and more likely) I will talk about 95% more to make up for lost time.
No one really understands me here, they say I have a weird accent. I thought that once I left Denver the jokes about my weird accent would dissipate...however, they have gotten much worse since I have been in India. Yes, we are both speaking English, but their version is so different. They mumble and put emphasis on very different syllables. Wednesday is actually said "Wed-nes-deh" and Lunch is "Luns" (I thought they kept saying lungs...i was confused) and commented is coe-ment-ted, emphasis on the ment. It's like a game really, and when I speak you should see the look on people faces! Priceless! They have no idea what I'm saying. My favorite part is the ENGLISH teacher has no idea what I'm saying, he always says "I'm not getting you" So i try to think of other words to explain what I'm trying to say. You try to think of other words to explain denomination and let me know how you would explain it.
I have a lot of down time here, at least I will until Thursday. On the third I go to another orphanage to other work. Very different work, for a very different organization. But for now I am trying to appreciate the alone time and silence. I have been reading and praying a LOT. The things that always seem to work their way out of my busy schedule when I am at home. But reading become very interesting when there is no tv, cell phone, or computer at hand.
Prayer is something very sacred here, and I have had many conversation about it. Where as many see it as somewhat mystical in the states, or maybe they forget or don't have time to make a prayer meeting every week, here it is the first and last thing you do every day. No matter what religion. God is present and living here and it only seems normal to pray to him..since He is directing their lives. Some of the conversations I have had about it have also included spiritual warfare and things like that. One recent conversation I have to share. I was sitting at Satish's house with his entire family and they were talking about the times their father performed exorcisms. On legit demons.
Yea.
When they asked me if I had ever seen a demon cast out and I said "no" they looked at me like I had been living under a rock my entire life. They had all seen numerous demons cast out - all on separate occasions. And then they went into detail..
They told a story of this girl, about 11, who had very long hair, down to her waist. One night she sat straight up and so did her hair. All the way up in the air, eyes rolled back in her head. Her parents called their father to cast the demons out, so he came and they said it looked like a furry animal crawling across the floor after it came out. Satish still shivers thinking about it. There were many other stories, and when they talked about the US and why I hadn't seen any I said perhaps it's because sin and Satan manifests itself differently according to the culture. Even the Bible itself says that Satan was crafty (see Gensis 3:1). In the US demons may be drugs, and alcohol..I'm not really sure...but I really think it depends on the culture, as long as it ruins lives and it is not of God, I think you could call it Satan. Anyway, it was all very interesting, if you want to hear the other stories, we'll talk. But I will warn you I didn't sleep at all the night we talked about it.
I am starting to get used to things here. The crazy, crazy driving with no traffic laws or lines in the road. People don't use turn signals, they use their horn. I have started enjoying bucket showers and eating with my hands! I have also started responding to "auntie" which is what the kids at the hostel call me and "sister" which is what the teachers call me since they can't pronounce Carolyn.
But there are things I just cannot get used to. The staring. People watch me do everything, to see if I do it differently or the same. I am honesty surprised they haven't invited themselves into the bathroom with me yet. Along with the staring comes royal treatment which I am not at all used to and don't really like. I was standing in a kitchenware shop today waiting for my house mom to buy some things and the guys all ran outside and got me a chair to sit down, and if I even lift a finger to help with the meals, sweeping, or laundry I get yelled at. Its so weird. I want to help, I want to work. I like cleaning. I appreciate the service and kindness but I try to find new and sneaky ways to help before I get caught and sent to my room to "rest". It's humbling to be waited on, but I hope they don't think I expect it, i always tell them I don't..but again, no one understands me so I doubt they know what I'm saying.
I love the kids at the hostel where I am staying. Everyday after school we play fun games and they have kind of taught me how to play cricket. Last night I gave them some toys like cars for the boys and hair barrettes for the girls and coloring books. They absolutely went crazy over them. They appreciated such a small toy so much, they didn't put it down all night and we all colored until it was time for prayer at 9. They bring me so much joy and I love being around them. If i could just stay here and play with them all the time I would be happy. But they always want me to sing. They love my singing and eveynight at prayer they say "AUNTIE! You sing now! sing!" and i can't resist. So now Victor said i had to sing at church on sunday...by myself...in front of everyone. ay ay ay.
okay...I think this post is long enough. I feel like i have so many other stories and things to write! But I hope this will be god enough reading material for the next several days. I miss everyone a lot! Only 27 more days here...crazy! For now I leave you with this amazing compliments of Andrea Swatski :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOqxSaW05p4&feature=rec-fresh
One:
In a culture where no means yes and leaving food on your plate, no matter how much you started out with, is rude...I am stuffed and gaining weight. All the time. I am considering telling people I am fasting everyday and then sneaking food when I am alone. They believe in force feeding over here and guests get extra and no matter how long I stay, I am still considered a guest. So i try to stuff all the food in and then they give me more..
Two:
I will be covered in paint, or mendhi..the girls at the hostel love to put this traditional paint on me, on my hands and arms. They said it only lasts 10 days, but when I went to school the next day all the teachers said..oh no, it lasts 2 months. I hope its off in time for Jessica's wedding!!
Three:
I will be speaking about 95% less than before I left. I figure since I sit in silence so much here, I will get used to not speaking and become a "quiet person" OR (and more likely) I will talk about 95% more to make up for lost time.
No one really understands me here, they say I have a weird accent. I thought that once I left Denver the jokes about my weird accent would dissipate...however, they have gotten much worse since I have been in India. Yes, we are both speaking English, but their version is so different. They mumble and put emphasis on very different syllables. Wednesday is actually said "Wed-nes-deh" and Lunch is "Luns" (I thought they kept saying lungs...i was confused) and commented is coe-ment-ted, emphasis on the ment. It's like a game really, and when I speak you should see the look on people faces! Priceless! They have no idea what I'm saying. My favorite part is the ENGLISH teacher has no idea what I'm saying, he always says "I'm not getting you" So i try to think of other words to explain what I'm trying to say. You try to think of other words to explain denomination and let me know how you would explain it.
I have a lot of down time here, at least I will until Thursday. On the third I go to another orphanage to other work. Very different work, for a very different organization. But for now I am trying to appreciate the alone time and silence. I have been reading and praying a LOT. The things that always seem to work their way out of my busy schedule when I am at home. But reading become very interesting when there is no tv, cell phone, or computer at hand.
Prayer is something very sacred here, and I have had many conversation about it. Where as many see it as somewhat mystical in the states, or maybe they forget or don't have time to make a prayer meeting every week, here it is the first and last thing you do every day. No matter what religion. God is present and living here and it only seems normal to pray to him..since He is directing their lives. Some of the conversations I have had about it have also included spiritual warfare and things like that. One recent conversation I have to share. I was sitting at Satish's house with his entire family and they were talking about the times their father performed exorcisms. On legit demons.
Yea.
When they asked me if I had ever seen a demon cast out and I said "no" they looked at me like I had been living under a rock my entire life. They had all seen numerous demons cast out - all on separate occasions. And then they went into detail..
They told a story of this girl, about 11, who had very long hair, down to her waist. One night she sat straight up and so did her hair. All the way up in the air, eyes rolled back in her head. Her parents called their father to cast the demons out, so he came and they said it looked like a furry animal crawling across the floor after it came out. Satish still shivers thinking about it. There were many other stories, and when they talked about the US and why I hadn't seen any I said perhaps it's because sin and Satan manifests itself differently according to the culture. Even the Bible itself says that Satan was crafty (see Gensis 3:1). In the US demons may be drugs, and alcohol..I'm not really sure...but I really think it depends on the culture, as long as it ruins lives and it is not of God, I think you could call it Satan. Anyway, it was all very interesting, if you want to hear the other stories, we'll talk. But I will warn you I didn't sleep at all the night we talked about it.
I am starting to get used to things here. The crazy, crazy driving with no traffic laws or lines in the road. People don't use turn signals, they use their horn. I have started enjoying bucket showers and eating with my hands! I have also started responding to "auntie" which is what the kids at the hostel call me and "sister" which is what the teachers call me since they can't pronounce Carolyn.
But there are things I just cannot get used to. The staring. People watch me do everything, to see if I do it differently or the same. I am honesty surprised they haven't invited themselves into the bathroom with me yet. Along with the staring comes royal treatment which I am not at all used to and don't really like. I was standing in a kitchenware shop today waiting for my house mom to buy some things and the guys all ran outside and got me a chair to sit down, and if I even lift a finger to help with the meals, sweeping, or laundry I get yelled at. Its so weird. I want to help, I want to work. I like cleaning. I appreciate the service and kindness but I try to find new and sneaky ways to help before I get caught and sent to my room to "rest". It's humbling to be waited on, but I hope they don't think I expect it, i always tell them I don't..but again, no one understands me so I doubt they know what I'm saying.
I love the kids at the hostel where I am staying. Everyday after school we play fun games and they have kind of taught me how to play cricket. Last night I gave them some toys like cars for the boys and hair barrettes for the girls and coloring books. They absolutely went crazy over them. They appreciated such a small toy so much, they didn't put it down all night and we all colored until it was time for prayer at 9. They bring me so much joy and I love being around them. If i could just stay here and play with them all the time I would be happy. But they always want me to sing. They love my singing and eveynight at prayer they say "AUNTIE! You sing now! sing!" and i can't resist. So now Victor said i had to sing at church on sunday...by myself...in front of everyone. ay ay ay.
okay...I think this post is long enough. I feel like i have so many other stories and things to write! But I hope this will be god enough reading material for the next several days. I miss everyone a lot! Only 27 more days here...crazy! For now I leave you with this amazing compliments of Andrea Swatski :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOqxSaW05p4&feature=rec-fresh
Saturday, June 21, 2008
No one said it would be easy....
...no one ever said it would be this hard. Things in India are nothing like I expected! I have been here 10 days and I feel like I have learned so much about the culture and about myself that I feel like I have been here for 10 years. In a good way of course...I have been teaching for the past week which is so hard. I didn't really know what to expect when I came, but I didn't think they would place me in front of a class and say "teach". Well thats what happened. Day 1 at the school in front of 70 7th graders and told to teach English....it was kind of humorous what I came up with and then I had to do the same thing for 8th, 9th, and 10th...all at very different levels, but me teaching the same thing: American greetings. The next day I taught verbs and nouns etc...they really have no clue what I'm saying. They know English, but my accent is so different from theirs that they are often confused and stare at me very blankly before they begin to talk amongst themselves...
Living at the girls home is so good though, everyday after school I get to play games like duck, duck, goose and red rover..they LOVE it! It is so much fun for me to play with them and get to know them. At night we have prayer and eat dinner around 930...late meals here.
Things are going really well and I haven't been too terribly homesick, although it's hard having so much free time,but it's good and I am doing a LOT of reading, writing, and praying. Somethings I haven't had time to do in the US...I miss everyone a lot though and can't wait to see everyone and tell my crazy stories in person...which you know I will have tons, complete with hand motions and all.
In 2 weeks, I switch to another orphanage and will get to do some traveling around the country! Maybe even out of the country to Cambodia! :) I am so excited about this adventure!
Living at the girls home is so good though, everyday after school I get to play games like duck, duck, goose and red rover..they LOVE it! It is so much fun for me to play with them and get to know them. At night we have prayer and eat dinner around 930...late meals here.
Things are going really well and I haven't been too terribly homesick, although it's hard having so much free time,but it's good and I am doing a LOT of reading, writing, and praying. Somethings I haven't had time to do in the US...I miss everyone a lot though and can't wait to see everyone and tell my crazy stories in person...which you know I will have tons, complete with hand motions and all.
In 2 weeks, I switch to another orphanage and will get to do some traveling around the country! Maybe even out of the country to Cambodia! :) I am so excited about this adventure!
Monday, June 16, 2008
Day 1
Well, I am here. In India. Getting here was half the battle I feel like. My plane ticket said I would be arriving on Friday June 13. That was just a lie. I actually arrived on Saturday June 14 in Bangalore at 4:30 in the morning all alone. I did not have Victor's phone number or address, and so I was stranded, because he was not at the airport. By the time I figured that out, I was outside of the airport, with all of my luggage. I did not know that you cannot get back in once you are out. I had only american money and no phone. But I was persistent. I showed the security guards that I had a boarding pass and I had just arrived and that I just needed to use the phone. They didn't understand my hand motion for phone...so they got their chief. It was all very dramatic when you haven't slept in 2 days and you are in another country with no phone number or address or access to a computer. I managed to get back in and found Satish's number, a guy I met in Denver and knew he lived here in Bangalore. He was literally a God send! My first weekend in India was nothing like I expected. I went to a local pub, the movies, had Subway and pizza hut, and slept in as late as I wanted. This was a really nice welcome. Satish and his family are amazing and they didn't want to culture shock me too much so I have only had a couple Indian dishes and they were all made "bland" which is funny because they weren't bland at all. His family is great and I have my own room there and am planning on working at his mission the last 3 weeks I am here, and he has welcomed me to stay there on weekends.
I am at the first orphanage I was supposed to work at the whole time, but I am only planning on being here the first 3 weeks. I thought I would break it up a bit. It is so huge! 800 kids....I have my own room at the orphanage and it is huge as well. It is so strange being here, but I am honestly trying to soak up the experience and not think about missing home and the comforts of America too much.
Feel free to write me emails and if you are planning on sending me any mail the address has changed from the original I first sent...email me if you want it.
i miss everyone a lot but am enjoying my time here! I still kind of can't believe I am here.
I am at the first orphanage I was supposed to work at the whole time, but I am only planning on being here the first 3 weeks. I thought I would break it up a bit. It is so huge! 800 kids....I have my own room at the orphanage and it is huge as well. It is so strange being here, but I am honestly trying to soak up the experience and not think about missing home and the comforts of America too much.
Feel free to write me emails and if you are planning on sending me any mail the address has changed from the original I first sent...email me if you want it.
i miss everyone a lot but am enjoying my time here! I still kind of can't believe I am here.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
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